No Waffles for Breakfast!

Feb 13

What’s in a waffle?—Or on it?—Hopefully a lot of cream, fruits and syrup—maybe chocolate too!

But how about a spiritual waffle? What does that mean? Imagine the work of the young spiritual aspirant. Said aspirant has studied the fundamentals of the Awakening of the Consciousness, they have begun to see where SOME of the internal traps lie within their own psyche—their piece of soul—and now they have discovered a heavenly garden within their heart.

Perhaps this internal place houses a marble gazebo surrounded with lush, green grass that is softer than carpet. Perhaps the marble gazebo is decorated with perfumed, blooming red & yellow roses. Perhaps the warm sun shines upon this glowing heart-temple and in this secret and sacred, internal place of stability and balance is where said neophyte discovers the beginning of continuous awareness, of inner silence and they have now encountered SOME peace, SOME understanding, SOME contentment. They have become aware of an inner compass, an inner light.

THE WORK HAS BEGUN!

So, what’s next? This is a message for those who have had some experiences, some positive moments, some meditation practice, some balance, but now they find themselves in a desert of doubt. They feel like they are not sure and sometimes the light goes out—they believe, they tell themselves.

It is especially at this point in the journey, that the hero of the story will begin to doubt. This is the commonality we observe in every fairytale, every journey-myth, every trope. How does it go? Just how it goes in The Odyssey, Book 5 (Samuel Butler, 1900 translation) when Odysseus leaves Calypso and his raft is destroyed by Poseidon (a symbol of our own inner demons and darkness with which we must contend in any spiritual path towards wholeness) he cries out in despair.

“Alas,” said he to himself in his dismay, “whatever will become of me? I am afraid Calypso was right when she said I should have trouble by sea before I got home. It is all coming true. Jove is filling heaven with clouds, and the sea with wind; I am now safe to perish.”

“Woe is me that I was not drowned in the great waves on that day when all my comrades perished on the plain of Troy.”

Odysseus doubts whether he has what it takes to carry on.

Or it happens similarly as it did for the hero, Tanjiro, in the animae Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba’s Entertainment District Arc. There is no help nearby and Tanjiro is seemingly hopelessly left to fight outmatched against Daki—the Upper Rank Six demon (in art this universal truth of battling demons is depicting a symbol of our inner battle with ourselves), he asks himself, “Can I really do this alone?”

Then many times he loses his breath or vision as he continuously pushes himself to his limits to take on one of the strongest forces he has ever faced. He bemoans his struggle through the imbalance in force between them, asking himself in despair, “Why am I so weak?”

In the end, with much exertion, many wounds and serious persistence, inwardly encouraging himself not to give into these doubts, Tanjiro—with the help of his Demon Slayer friends—finally succeeds in slaying this seemingly invincible foe.

Now, back to that waffle. A waffle is certainly something delicious to eat. But our discussion here refers to the key moment of clarity for the individual, when they—through the inner work—begin to contact a kind of confidence and knowing or internal information. They are at peace in the present moment without necessarily intellectually having all of the answers. Because this is the first step in a long journey, the aspirant now begins to face the internal elements which fight against this move toward inner peace and inner UNITY. So, begin the doubts. They receive insight or internal guidance from their own heart, the Voice of the their Being, following this, the mind comes in to deny it. So they waffle. They go back and forth. Clarity-Confusion. Surety-Suspicion. Direction-Deflation. So, the neophyte is experiencing “the waffle”, sometimes one way, sometimes the other.

What is happening? The neophyte is fighting to “link in”, to hook up to their own unique frequency, their connection to Source. Think of it like an antenna that has been raised, but it is blowing in the wind, creating static. As the wind blows, the connection comes and goes, but it is not non-existent, it is just fluctuating. The work that the aspirant does to dissolve more aggregates (internal filters which hide the light), the antenna becomes stronger until the wind no longer bend it.

So we know how the waffling happens. What does it look like? These inner tricks have many lines which the young practitioner may have observed. But, because they are just now reaching THIS stage of the journey, there is not yet the understanding of what is taking place, what they must go through. This is a stage in which they DO HAVE the power to make it through, by understanding the nature of their challenge.

One of the biggest tricks that could arise is that the aspirant imagines that they do not understand something that they innately do. When they are in that garden, that heart-temple, where there are both peace and stillness, when the roaring of the mind is settled for a moment, they KNOW. They certainly don’t know everything, but they know what they need to know, not with words, not from desire, they simply have a sense of the appropriate direction for them to take and they have the clean will to move in that direction, without that inner “waffling”—going back and forth between “options”—dualistic choices that give us a sense of “either-or”.

But at another time, when the unsuspecting one is now in different state, their awareness has dropped, the mind has become active, then in creeps doubt. It is not doubt regarding a belief system, for belief systems are not useful in the work of surrendering to moment-to-moment truth. But it is a doubt of one’s own inner light.

The myth of Sofia tells that she—wisdom—was tricked by a shiny false light and then trapped in the lower dimensions. Those who are not in the mystery studies take this to mean that we are literally within a trap created by an external attacker who has trapped Divine Source, when really, it is our own inner limitations that trap our own inner light.

In the application of this myth, we understand that that it is really our own doubts and lies told to ourselves by ourselves—within the subconscious—who in fact constitute this “deceiver”. No one is tricking us. We deceive ourselves.

So, the classic doubt is a false belief. We face a truth that we have understood in our hearts, and in those moments of disconnection from our more powerful inner guidance (what we call in Gnosis our Being, our very own Inner God), we say, “I DON’T UNDERSTAND. I CAN’T UNDERSTAND. NOR WILL I EVER.”

Some other lines used in this internal deception, “That’s too hard for me. I won’t meditate on that now. I cannot dissolve that ego yet. That person knows things, but I don’t know. And I can’t know right now.” When we stay with these thoughts, they will consume our practice and our spiritual potential.

In the Gnostic teachings, we understand these to be what are called “egos”. These are internal aspects of our own psychology which trap us in illusion. These illusions do not just damage our inner state of mind and emotions, but also our external circumstances and health.

From my own personal experience and also in the case of others I know, the waffling causes physical illness. Whenever I have been in a place of doubt, going back and forth between the Being—the truth—and the pressures of social structures or internal programming, this has resulted in flu and respiratory ailments that lasted anywhere from 1 - 6 weeks. So besides the fact that this waffling pulls us away from aligning with our highest possible potential in that moment, it certainly can bring on the nuisance of health issues too!

The Theosophical writings mention that,

“One may perceive the presence of disease or illness as a break or clog in the flow of vital force—usually at more than one level of vibration; or as a drooping” of the lines of energy.

C.W. Leadbeater described fixed ideas or prejudices as appearing like “Warts” on the mental body. It is not hard to imagine that these chronic clogs in the flow of energies result in corresponding illnesses or disabilities.” (The Powers of Healing, The Theosophical Order of Service, n.d.)

Wow!—And yuk! Spiritual warts, anyone? That is what these nasties are. We do NOT profit from them in the long run, besides the wisdom we can extract by learning from them and dissolving them.

Doubts are like warts on the mental body.

So how do we break these doubts?

We need to come out of the Maze of the Mind. LET IT GO!—Just as Idina Menzel sings in the theme song from the children’s Disney cartoon, Frozen. Let those ugly astral-wart mental doubts GO! When you see them, drop them.

Master Samael Aun Weor said:

“The mind that says ‘I cannot understand’ is closed. Man believes himself incapable because he ignores his own possibilities. The Essence has infinite faculties, but they remain trapped within the ego. To understand something new, one must abandon what one believes one knows. When the mind is quiet, the Being speaks.”
—Compiled from The Revolution of the Dialectic, The Voice of the Silence, The Great Rebellion & Revolutionary Psychology

Self-doubt—of this kind—is not really a doubt that believes it is no good as a human and is busy diminishing the egoic “person”, but really it is a sense of a separate person in the first place, who does not understand the existence and capability of its true higher aspect and true nature, who does not trust in one’s BEING.

So, the cure is simple. Know about doubts. Know about the lies they tell. Know that they are lies. They are a trick of our internal demons to delay our stronger connection with the Being. This stronger connection has been brewing and is already on the horizon—the connection which will become the death of these doubts. Knowing this, they strike now, while they still can, hoping they can perpetuate their reason for existing, to continue as “the one who doubts”.

Did you know that everything has a way of being interconnected? One of the most bizarre symbols was the “Waffle Party” that featured in the Season Finale of Season One of the TV show Severance on Apple TV. (Listen to our talk on Discernment vs. Judgement — In a World of Lies to understand more about these symbols and how these shows use Black Lodge [the ego and its activities in the construct] coercion. By the way, we are not necessarily recommending this show, as such. If it is watched unconsciously, there is subliminal programming to tell the aspirant to choose the ego instead of the Being, our higher aspect. If watched consciously and in moderated sittings, it can be a study of how far the systems of control fight to keep the consciousness asleep extend to every part of society and media.)

The character Dylan in the Waffle Party Episode of Apple TV’s Severance. Fair Use.

The character who wins this “treat” for high work outputs is given a strange ritualistic show of masked dancers, a single waffle, and a stay in the house of the head source of the workers’ oppression. In its exoteric symbolism this is a protest against capitalism where the worker is infantilized, put under sexual control (symbolizing how control is exerted through desire), manipulated and psychologically fragmented (as symbolized in the ritual dance of the Four Temperaments).

However, in an esoteric light, we understand the staying in the house of our oppressor to be how we—in our own psychology have oppressed ourselves, creating our own internal psychological house with its own characters, highlighting our internal divided nature which, if healed, can be transformed and united into a Permanent Center of Gravity. And the last symbol of course, is the control through the energy of sex or desire. Creative energy is really our ability to create through directed attention—a power we must cultivate through meditation and consistent awareness training. When we take back this energy for more fruitful uses, we discover that our power to maintain awareness and to choose where this attention is directed grows.

The double meaning that could also be symbolized from this waffle analogy is that when the character is celebrating with a waffle, it celebrates the very split itself, glorifying and desiring to retain this fractured nature. So the fallen ones will continue to waffle, whether this is moving back-and-forth between dualistic poles, yes & no, wrong & right, this or that, should I or shouldn’t I, or whether it is for the student of light who is waffling between Source guiding within and the doubts of the mind and erode our confidence in the BEING.

But the ones who use their trained awareness to understand the situation will say: This is waffling; this is doubt; this is not my true nature, then move into the stage where they have the power to DROP IT. Say no to the doubts and lies. Say no to those thoughts that arise which say, “You cannot find truth, you cannot be free, you have no light, you must turn to a religion, a directive, a control mechanism…”

It is only the ego who wants to latch onto this “solidness”, that things should always be how I expect them, and currently it’s just “that time” when I expect a lot of doubt should appear, so let’s be doubtful in myself for awhile… Then this particular problem comes and goes for a time until another one comes along to distract us. Later the waffling problem comes back again because we didn’t address it.

But if we stop feeding it, if we use the awareness and the consciousness to see it for the illusion that it is, to rest in the Divine Love that is strong enough to hold us and all our situations, then we slowly find that we are able to stay more and more present within that Garden of Peace & Knowing. The decision rests in our hands.

Which will you choose? The ego or the Being? Fear & doubt or trust?

Okay, but what if I really feel like I don’t know? And I’m confused? Shhhh shhhhh shhhh. Hush the doubts, the voices. Do not let the illusion creep in and overtake you.

With the LIGHT of your BEING shining in your heart, you can have what is called Solar Faith! This means you feel the KNOWER inside and its vibrance. "We must learn to think with the heart and to feel with the head... Our mind must become exquisitely sensitive and delicate... We must change the process of reasoning for the beauty of comprehension," Igneous Rose, Samael Aun Weor.

So trust. Be faithful & true. Do not rely on the guidance of another who may not fully understand your path. Take any advice as you need, but do not rely on it lest it become a crutch. Go within. There is light. Work to uncover it and let it shine. Every time we trust, every time we take action, we learn to feel and move with this light. We may not always get it right, but we have to try in order to learn. Someone who never made any mistakes nor had any shortcomings is also someone so timid and avoidant that they never attempted something great.

We would rather trip and learn than to be frozen with pride and inner lies.

It becomes a question of, will you cede your sovereignty that comes from the Divine within, outsourcing your birthright to another? Or will you give up the fear, the shame, the lies, the waffling? Will you link into your INNER GOD, relaxing into that surrender, that trusting of one’s inner knowing, no matter what that entails?

In Revolution of the Dialectic, Master Samael Aun Weor challenges the neophyte regarding his task to surrender to his inner divinity, his inner light, to take one step closer to becoming an internal unity.

“When one establishes within oneself a Permanent Center of Gravity, when one has created a stable psychological center through conscious work and voluntary sufferings, then one is no longer the victim of circumstances. One ceases to be a toy of mechanical reactions. The Permanent Center of Gravity gives continuity of purpose, firmness in decisions, and stability in the Work. Without that center, the human being is fragmented, contradictory, and inconsistent.”

The spiritual aspirant works to establish a Permanent Center of Gravity

Of course, with daily deep ego dissolution meditation to dissolve these aggregates, we can eventually reach the stage in which these thoughts no longer even ARISE. But we must begin by seeing and understanding what they are. We must take the strong resolve to break free and remain free, not through suppression or pretending, not through a dead system of rules, but through true and consistent inner work.

So the next time these demons of the mind raise their ugly heads, think of what the “Waffle Party” means, that by remaining WITH doubt—in a way—we are metaphorically partaking of this sad “Waffle Party” which mocks our BEING by celebrating how separate, cut-off and fragmented we feel; think of Odysseus despairing far from home after facing the Cicones, the Lotus-Eaters, Polyphemus and many more—yet he pressed on even after Poseidon’s storms destroyed his raft and he made it home, reunited with Penelope and took back Ithaca; think of Tanjiro, beaten to despair, his limbs barely hanging on, bones fractured and clearly outmatched, yet refusing to keel over and give his opponent satisfaction, how by refusing to give up, he was able to hold on until the very end and finally destroy Daki the demon who seemed impossible to kill.

By saying no to our darkness, our disbelief, our doubt, we surrender these tight structures which block our inner light, our inner wisdom. By reinvigorating our courage, our trust in our own internal HIGHER POWER, we can face any difficulty, we can deal with any question or problem, we can move forward in our spiritual lives. Our only task is to, again and again, surrender, drop the lies and stories, reset, connect to Source through the heart, and to trust the truth of the moment, bravely; our task is to release the doubts and go back to our own inner heart-temple, where grow the perfumed yellow & red roses, where the lush grass is softer than carpet, where the sun shines warmly and we can rest within the marble gazebo surrounded by tranquil light, knowing our Being is here & now!

So what’s in a waffle? Now you know. Just don’t let the waffle be in you.